you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
