sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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