She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
