Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
