Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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