I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Randomize
