I only kidnapped one of them. chill
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
