Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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