Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
