he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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