why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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