Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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