New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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