Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
