I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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