'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize
