Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
