I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize