she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
