oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Duck Duck Cougar?
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Randomize
