I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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