Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
