she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
