puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
