I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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