One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
