Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
