I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Randomize
