everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
i think my cat just said my name.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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