need another drink. this is the easiest way
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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