yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
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