he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
