everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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