apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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