Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Even my vagina gasped.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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