Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Randomize
