Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
