If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize
