I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
