I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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