I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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