I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
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