Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I just blew my weed a kiss
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
