I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
fuck your aforementioned shoe
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
