you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
And then the night went full on bisexual.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
