her vagine was all disorganized.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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