Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
