she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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