if you like me you must not know who I am
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Randomize
