is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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